


Permanent Poker Face

by Juliko



Category: Love Live! School Idol Festival ALL STARS (Video Game), ラブライブ! 虹ヶ咲学園スクールアイドル同好会 | Love Live! Nijigasaki Gakuen School Idol Doukoukai (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bullying, Comfort/Angst, Disability AU, Female Friendship, Gen, Happy Ending, Minor Character Death, Minor Original Character(s), Past Character Death, Reduced Affect Display, Sad and Happy, Sad with a Happy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 12:15:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28743084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Juliko/pseuds/Juliko
Summary: "For so many years, Rina thought something was wrong with her, and that whatever was wrong with her would be something nobody would be able to figure out. Not even her, and she always prided herself on being able to figure things out. But an unemotive face wasn’t like faulty wiring in a machine, a disjointed robotic limb, or a glitch in a game’s graphics. Even so, now her unemotive face actually had a name. An actual name, something that solidified it as being real. As she laid her head against the car window, watching the blurry scenery fly right by her, there was some comfort to be had now that she had some kind of answer for why her face was the way it was.But just because she had the answer for her problem didn’t mean everything would be hunky-dory after that."An AU fic where instead of losing the ability to show emotions later in life, Rina is born with Reduced Affect Display.
Relationships: Miyashita Ai/Tennouji Rina
Comments: 7
Kudos: 45





	Permanent Poker Face

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there! Another Love Live Nijigaku fan fic incoming, because I love Rina and wanted to write a fic about her. I haven't played the game, but I looked up that apparently Rina's backstory has it that she lost the ability to show facial expressions because her parents worked a lot. I doubt that happens in real life, but I did find out that there is an actual disorder for a lack of displaying facial expressions, Reduced Affect Display. I thought of Rina and wondered..."I wonder if I could write a story about this?" So I banged this out so I could explore the idea. It's probably not that good, but I hope you enjoy it! If not, that's okay too. Any comments and critique are welcome!

Rina Tennoji rarely expressed emotions on her face, and as far as she knew, that was fine.

But things started to change when she entered elementary school. She saw kids with big smiles on their faces, opening their mouths wide, with merry laughter that sounded like joyful music. Other kids had contorted red faces, eyes thick and puffy, drowning in tears as they clung to their mothers’ legs, pleading for them to stay or take them back home. Other kids shouted at each other, raising their voices explosively. On her first day of elementary school, Rina looked up at her mother, and she saw an odd expression on her face. Her mother’s eyes went wide, her mouth had parted open just a bit, and her face blanched, like she saw a ghost. Did she see something scary? Little Rina couldn’t imagine what could make her mother look so...frightened.

“Mommy? What’s wrong?” Rina asked, concerned. But her monotone voice didn’t reflect her worry.

Her daughter’s voice seemed to snap her back to reality, as she forced a smile and bent down. “It’s nothing, sweetie. I’ll come back to pick you up at three o’clock. Now, you be good, do what your teachers tell you, and have a great day. I want you to tell me all about the fun things you’ll learn afterward. Okay?”

Rina’s lips curled upward just a quiver and she gave a nod. But a part of her wished she didn’t have to go. She wished her mother could stay with her, just like always. Of course, this was not to be, and the two waved goodbye before Rina was escorted into a classroom with many other kids.

As it turned out, Rina enjoyed school quite a bit. Her teacher was nice, the other kids invited her to play games with them, and she got to learn lots of new things. But one day, several weeks into the school year, one of the kids she sat next to asked her an odd question.

“Rina-chan? Why don’t you ever smile?”

“Huh?” The question was so out of nowhere, Rina could only stare back at her, dumbfounded. “What do you mean? I smile.”

“Little ones, yeah, but you never smile super big like everybody else does,” The girl told her.

“I don’t?” Rina could only raise her eyebrows in confusion.

Another child, a little boy, chimed in soon after. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you get mad or sad or scared or anything!” He exclaimed.

“Really?”

“Yeah!”

Was that how they saw her? Or how she came across? Rina looked down at her shoes, searching for an answer that could satisfy them. She found none. Then she remembered their big smiles, their crying faces, their angry faces, and the blanched look her mother had when she saw the other kids on her first day. Was...that why she looked so scared? This was too much for Rina.

The only thing she could say to that was, “Is that bad?” Surely that couldn’t be a bad thing, right? Rina hoped it wasn’t.

“I dunno,” The girl replied, folding her arms, looking just as perplexed as Rina was.

But the little boy gave a laugh. “Maybe you’re a robot or something!”

Rina furrowed her eyebrows. “I’m not a robot.”

Robots were machines. Robots were man made, and could do anything, like shoot lasers and lift heavy objects that people couldn’t. As far as Rina knew, she wasn’t a machine. It wasn’t nice to call someone names, as her mother had told her once before. Before the three could talk further, the bell signaling the end of recess rang, so the conversation had ended. Even so, their inquiries continued to echo in the depths of Rina’s mind. Did she know how to smile big? Or be sad or mad? Was not doing so a bad thing?

It was too big a concept to untangle in her head, so Rina decided to forget about it. Until two weeks later, when her class talked about expressing emotions. One day, her teacher had a big board up that had yellow circles on it, all of them depicting various faces and expressions.

“Kids, today we’re going to talk about emotions. They’re things that we feel,” The teacher began, pointing to the chart she put up. “And we express them with our faces. See this one here?” She pointed to one yellow face with closed eyes and a big smile. “This is a happy face. Like this!” The teacher flashed a big, toothy grin, squeezed her eyes shut, and used both index fingers to point to her face.

A fresh pang of envy sprouted in Rina’s heart. Her teacher made it seem so easy. Rina looked at her reflection in the window, curling her lips up. They barely formed even the faintest hint of a semicircle, remaining in a firm line. Rina tried it again, smiling once more. It grew enough to be classified as an arc, but it still didn’t reach far enough or wide enough. Was this what everyone around her saw? The realization was enough to drone out her teacher’s palavering, if only for a brief moment.

“This is an angry face. Grrrr!” The teacher contorted her face, squinted her eyes, and bared her teeth, making a harsh noise to convey mock anger. “This is the face you make when, say, someone breaks your toys or is mean to you or hurts your feelings in a way that makes you feel like you want to explode!” The teacher raised her arms up and spread them akimbo in dual arcs, imitating what an explosion would look like.

Some of the kids laughed when she made her grunting noise. Rina didn’t, but she did smile just a bit when her teacher made that gesture. To Rina, it looked more like a plant sprouting from the ground than an explosion.

“This is the face you make when you’re calm,” The teacher pointed to one face that was just a yellow circle, two black dots, and a line. “The face you make when nothing bothers you at all. Like the one Rina-chan is making right now!”

“Huh?” Rina sucked in a barely audible gasp as the teacher skipped over to her.

“Even though I’m talking loudly, Rina-chan isn’t bothered by it one bit,” The teacher told them.

Rina didn’t think she was loud. That thought hadn’t even crossed her mind. But she did feel rather put off by her teacher suddenly singling her out like this. Rina flushed, and her heart began beating faster than it normally did. No, she wasn’t calm at all, even if her unchanging face might have claimed such. In that moment, Rina wished she could magically teleport back home, back to her parents.

Things got even more complicated when school picture day came around. It was the day when the teachers called a photographer and made them come to the school to take a picture of the entire class, along with individual photos of students for the yearbook. The photographer was a lithe, slinky-looking man who always looked irritated, like he didn’t have enough coffee to drink. Rina did find herself chuckling when she saw a funny green earring on one of his ears. The singular class photo was done first, which went well, as the kids made sure to behave and didn’t fidget when the photographer took the picture.

However, the problems began when the session for individual photographs went underway.

“That’s a big camera,” Rina whispered to the girl in front of her, in awe of the big camera the photographer was using. The girl nodded in agreement before she was called to sit on the stool. Rina stared at the camera, watching as the photographer positioned it a certain way, smiling when he saw the kids smile for their photos. That was when Rina noticed it. Every child flashed their biggest smiles, some displaying teeth, some not. All of them reached farther and wider than her own.

Would the photographer want her to smile like that? Rina’s blood ran cold. Could she even do this?

“Rina-chan?” A hand on her shoulder made Rina jump. “You’re next.”

There was no time to ponder. Rina was escorted to the stool, and she flashed her usual small smile. She focused her gaze on the lens of the camera, letting her mind wander to the fun computer game her father had shown her one day.

Unfortunately, her thoughts were interrupted by the photographer’s harsh voice. “Kid? You’re gonna need to smile bigger than that.”

“Huh?” Rina froze. Her regular smile wasn’t enough? She smiled again.

The photographer shot her an angry glare. “Come on! You can do better than that! I don’t have all day!” He barked, patience running thin.

Rina’s whole body trembled. Why was this photographer so mad? Rina smiled as big as she could. Did he think it wasn’t good enough? This was all she knew how to do. She turned towards the other students with a pleading look in her gold eyes. All of them simply exchanged confused glances, looking just as perplexed as she was. But could they even tell she was scared?

“Sir, she’s doing fine. Just take the picture,” The teacher told him, seeing that the situation was starting to get rather testy. She turned to Rina and waved her hand at her. “Don’t worry about it, sweetie!”

But the photographer didn’t see it that way. “Lady, I’m on a tight schedule here, and these photos need to come out perfect!” He hissed, making no effort to tone down his voice. “My job is to make these kids look like angels! That’s what the parents want!” He pointed right to Rina and exclaimed, “What are her parents gonna think if they see their daughter sitting there looking all stone faced like she doesn’t give a damn about anything?”

Stone faced?

“Why are you making this into a big issue? There’s nothing wrong with Rina-chan,” The teacher was quick to scold him for his outburst. “Look, just take the photo already. You’re scaring her.”

Scared was an understatement. Rina flashed her usual smile and held it together, but as soon as she saw the flash from the camera, she bolted off the stool and ran out of the auditorium like the school was on fire. She wanted to get out of that awful, suffocating place, away from that photographer’s judgmental eyes and scathing comments. His words echoed in her brain, each repetition louder than the last, like a broken tape recorder that wouldn’t stop playing. Rina found herself in the girls’ bathroom, hidden away in one of the stalls. Good. Nobody would pay her any mind in here.

Even so, the photographer’s anger was palpable, and she could still feel it. She couldn’t understand why her inability to give a big enough smile was such a big deal to him. Was it even a big deal? Then she thought of her classmate calling her a robot, her mother’s reaction to seeing all the kids, and she herself seeing everyone’s smiling faces. Why were they able to smile big and show emotions on their faces and she couldn’t? And that photographer made it seem like she wasn’t smiling big on purpose. He didn’t know her. How could he just jump to that conclusion like that? Was she not a normal girl? The injustice of it all and that particular realization hurt more than anything.

Tears trickled from her eyes, and low, pained sobs escaped her.

“This is all I know how to do...I can’t smile any bigger than that…” Rina sobbed into her tiny hands, wishing this entire day had never happened.

* * *

Concerned over what had happened, Rina’s teacher told her parents about what had happened, and thankfully, her parents were supportive and sympathetic. One day, not long after school picture day, Rina and her parents came to talk to the teacher after school. Rina went to another corner of the classroom to play games on her mother’s IPad, content to immerse herself in something to take her mind off of school. Since nobody else was in the classroom, Rina could hear every word they said.

All of it was about her.

“Has Rina-chan ever displayed any emotions or facial expressions at all?”

“She used to as a baby, but as she got older, she just stopped. But we can still tell when she’s happy or sad or mad about something, even without facial expressions.”

“Yes. We like to say she’s more of a girl of action.”

“Has she ever displayed any erratic or abnormal behavior?”

“Like what?”

“Well...how do I put this? Has she done anything that would make her come off as seemingly uncaring? Apathetic?”

“If you mean like enjoying seeing someone get hurt or acting like the entire world revolves around her, absolutely not,” Her mother asserted. “We’ve raised her better than that.”

“There’s a community garden near where we live, and Rina always takes the time to water the flowers. Whenever we take her to petting zoos, she’s always gentle with the animals,” Her father said. “One time, she saw a boy poking a pig with a stick and she told him to stop. Sure, she doesn’t show it on her face, but she cares deeply for people and animals.”

“I know. Thank you for confirming this with me. I suspect Rina-chan might have some sort of condition that makes her unable to express emotions with her face. But I’m not a doctor, so I can’t necessarily make that judgment.”

“Do you think we should take her to one?” Her father asked.

“I’d recommend it, if only to figure out just why Rina is the way she is. If it turns out nothing’s actually wrong with her, then that’ll be a big relief. But whatever the case, having answers is better than groping around in the dark.”

Rina’s blood ran cold again. _Was_ something wrong with her? Was that why the photographer got so angry? She never thought of her lack of expressions as being a problem. Her parents didn’t see it as a problem, and she could tell her teacher was just trying to help. But did she really need to see a doctor? Rina thought doctors only did stuff like check your heartbeat, stick you with needles, or give you medicine if you’re really sick. Or...was Rina somehow sick, and in a different way than the normal kind of sick? Bile rose in her throat. None of this made any sense. Yet again, the boy’s comment about her being a robot echoed in her mind. She was a human being, she reminded herself. Of course she was a regular girl.

Right?

The pink haired girl buried her face in her arms as she laid down on the desk, wishing she could just hide.

Not long after, the conversation had ended, and the Tennojis got in the car to drive home. Rina could only stare down at her hands blankly, but her eyes blurred with oncoming tears. She had her mother’s IPad next to her, but no gaming app or funny video could assuage the agony that had her in its grip.

“What’s wrong, sweetie?” Her mother asked. “You’ve been quiet all day.”

“Mommy?” Rina’s voice remained monotone, but her mother could hear the subtle, sorrowful tremble it adopted. “Am I...a robot?”

Her mother’s jaw dropped. “What brought this on? What makes you say that?”

“Everybody says I don’t smile big enough...or laugh or cry or get mad. That camera man said I’m stone faced. I try to smile and make it big but...it doesn’t work. I can’t do it...it’s not on purpose…” Rina whimpered. Stray tears finally trickled out. “Do I even know how to be happy or sad or mad? Would you...like me better...if I was normal?”

The only response she got was a set of arms pulling her close. Her mother’s rose scented perfume caressed her nostrils, and Rina closed her eyes, basking in the warmth of her mother’s cardigan fabric. She didn’t need to look at her mother’s face to know that she was sad. Rina could feel something wet on her hair, and a puff of breath in her roots.

“Rina. Don’t ever say we’d be better off if you were different,” Her mother said, her voice adopting a stone hard firmness that was alien to Rina. But there was warmth in it as well. “We love you just the way you are, and your father and I would never change anything about you. You’re our gift from God. Everybody has their own definition of normal. You being you is just one of those things.”

Rina put a hand on her mother’s sleeve. It was soft, just like the rest of her.

“We’re just going to find out why your face never changes. That doesn’t mean we think something is inherently wrong with you,” Her mother reminded her. Gradually, she released Rina from her embrace, kneeled down, and met her at eye level. “Let me ask you something. You asked if you even knew how to feel happy, sad, or mad. When that photographer said the things he did to you, how did that make you feel?”

Her mind’s eye recreated the image of the lanky photographer, his flat white hair, his contorted, wrinkled face, his booming voice, his index finger pointing right at her. Even his venomous words echoed with just as much intensity in her mind as they did when she first heard them.

_"What are her parents gonna think if they see their daughter sitting there looking all stone faced like she doesn’t give a damn about anything?”_

It was an easy question to answer. “Hurt. Sad. Mad.”

Her mother put a gentle hand on Rina’s cheek. It was warm to the touch. “See, Rina? Just because you don’t show feelings on your face, it doesn’t mean you can’t feel them in your heart.”

Rina’s eyes widened from the realization. She remembered running out of the auditorium and crying in the bathroom. She was so sad, she wished she could disappear. She was mad at the photographer for claiming she wasn’t smiling big on purpose. His venomous words hurt like a spear going through her heart. Rina smiled. Her mother was completely right. The knowledge made her feel just a little bit better.

Not long after that, her parents got in the car to drive back home. Her mother turned around in the front seat, facing Rina, and said, “How about I make us some spaghetti tonight? Is that okay?”

Rina nodded. Spaghetti was always good, especially the kind her mother made, with meatballs and sprinkled with just a touch of parsley. She smiled, looking forward to dinner.

* * *

As it turned out, finding out why Rina’s face was forever nonplussed was easier said than done. The Tennojis took Rina to every possible doctor in the area, and none of them had any answers for them. Several of them just brushed them off entirely, dismissing Rina’s lack of facial expression as her either not caring about anything, being apathetic, or assuming she was just pulling some kind of elaborate prank to cry out for attention. The Tennojis took offense to that particular remark, resolving to never ever go to that doctor ever again. What doctor would interpret Rina’s unchanging face as a cry for attention? Rina’s cheeks burned from the anger that simmered inside her.

It took a couple years, but when Rina was eight years old, the Tennojis finally found an answer. But it wasn’t anything they had ever expected. They found one doctor who, thankfully, didn’t brush them off. Instead, he had young Rina perform a series of tests...which weren’t really so much tests as they were games. He asked Rina to identify facial expressions on a chart, just like the one when she was in first grade. He also asked her to try and express emotions on her face. Other than smiling her usual small way, she couldn’t manage anything else. He also had her watch various clips from TV shows and movies and asked her how they made her feel. One was a blood-pumping action scene. The other was a scene where a child was mourning the loss of her beloved pet. Another time, Rina was inside a machine that scanned her brain.

After several more visits, the Tennojis returned for another appointment, and that was where the doctor told them his diagnosis.

“Reduced Affect Display?” Her parents asked in unison, exchanging wide eyed, perplexed looks. What in the world was that?

Rina tried not to pay too much attention, focusing on the brand new IPad her father bought her for her birthday two months ago. But her ears were perked right up, and she listened to every word.

“Yes,” The doctor said, holding a clipboard in his hands. “It’s a very distinct condition where someone is physically unable to express emotion on their faces, complete with reduced verbal and vocal inflection, even when engaged in situations where it would be expected to do so. Of course, as Rina-chan has shown me, people who have it are still able to feel emotions.”

“Do you know if anything caused it?” Her father asked.

“Well, there isn’t really so much as a singular cause for it, per se,” The doctor began. “Oftentimes, Reduced Affect Display is a symptom of something else. Autism, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Depression, some kind of brain damage, the amygdala being severed. But since Rina doesn’t fit the diagnostic criteria for any of those from what I could see, those can be ruled out.”

“I’m not depressed, and I don’t have brain damage,” Rina told him, looking up from her IPad.

The doctor smiled. “I know, Rina-chan. Someone with brain damage wouldn’t be able to help me set up Wi-Fi on my phone.”

A flush of pride swelled up in Rina’s chest. The doctor had attempted to bring up a web page on his phone to show her something, but was having trouble. Rina took it upon herself to help him with setting up his Wi-Fi. The doctor had installed it wrong, and Rina managed to fix it for him. How many eight-year-olds knew how to do that? Rina’s lips curled upward, barely forming a line, but her family could see her joy clear as day.

“It’s also common for Reduced Affect Display to be a side effect of being on certain medications,” The doctor elaborated.

“But Rina isn’t on any meds,” Her mother insisted.

The doctor sighed, rubbing the back of his bushy brown hair with one hand. “In all honesty, I can’t seem to figure out why Rina’s face is the way it is. But from what I can see, other than that, she’s perfectly healthy and normal.”

Normal...how exactly was a face that always stayed the same normal? Rina went back to her IPad, unsure of what to think of this new development. She knew the doctor wasn’t trying to be mean when he said that, as there was nothing inherently wrong with her. But she knew her permanent poker face wasn’t normal in any way.

“I didn’t see any anomalies in her brain from the MRI scan, so you can rest assured on that one,” The doctor said. “Based on what I’ve read, Reduced Affect Display doesn’t negatively affect one’s lifespan or quality of life.”

Again, Rina’s parents exchanged worried looks. “You say that like there’s no cure for it,” Rina’s mother said. Her eyebrows furrowed, and Rina could hear the worry twinging her voice.

“Yes. Just like there’s no root cause for it, there isn’t a known cure for it either,” The doctor answered, finishing with a drawn out sigh. “At least, not for the specific kind that Rina has, and since she doesn’t meet the diagnostic criteria for things like Autism, PTSD, or Depression, any methods we have for treating those won’t necessarily be a good fit for her. She doesn’t have any conditions or health issues that would require medication, so…”

Rina’s parents exhaled big sighs. Knowing their daughter wasn’t in any danger healthwise was a relief. Rina did the same, only her sigh was more subtle. However, hearing that there was no cure made her deflate. If that was the case, Rina would have to live with a permanent poker face for the rest of her life. Would she even be able to live a normal life? Would she even be able to make friends, get married, get a stable job, or anything like that? Or would her unchanging face make it harder to do so? Questions wracked Rina’s brain, like a Trojan virus threatening to eat everything in a computer’s hard drive.

Still, one good thing did come out of this. For so many years, Rina thought something was wrong with her, and that whatever was wrong with her would be something nobody would be able to figure out. Not even her, and she always prided herself on being able to figure things out. But an unemotive face wasn’t like faulty wiring in a machine, a disjointed robotic limb, or a glitch in a game’s graphics. Even so, now her unemotive face actually had a name. An actual name, something that solidified it as being real. As she laid her head against the car window, watching the blurry scenery fly right by her, there was some comfort to be had now that she had some kind of answer for why her face was the way it was.

But just because she had the answer for her problem didn’t mean everything would be hunky-dory after that.

* * *

Come her final year of elementary school, Rina found herself alone. Attempts to make friends had fallen on deaf ears once they found out that her face never changed one bit. When she entered middle school, she tried to rectify this however she could. One day, she received tickets to go to Joypolis, an indoor amusement park and department store chain. Her parents had taken her there lots of times when she was little, usually on the rare times they had days off from work or when she got good grades on important tests. But this time around, her parents couldn’t take time off from work, and Rina knew the area well enough to be able to go there by herself.

But when she went there, she often saw people clustered into groups, sharing laughs and having fun. Rina wanted to do that too. As she stared at her tickets, some girls a few desks away from her began talking in loud voices.

“Ugh!! I’d love to go to Joypolis one of these days! I hear it’s soooo much fun!”

“Me too! But we don’t have the money for tickets. I’d love to try their escape rooms.”

Rina’s ears perked up, and she shot a curious look in their direction. They wanted to go to Joypolis? She looked down at her three tickets once more. Maybe she could invite them. She shared some classes with that particular duo of girls, and only interacted with them a few times for some group projects. This could be a chance to make some friends. Rina steeled herself as she stood up and walked over to them. She flashed her neutral smile and greeted them as warmly as she could.

“Hello there,” Rina said.

The two girls turned to look and their eyes widened, like they had seen a ghost. A brief, awkward silence followed. “Umm...hi?” The girl with the red ponytail pushed the greeting out, but Rina could tell it was forced.

“You’re...Tennoji, right?” The girl with the black bob cut asked, raising a quizzical eyebrow.

Undeterred, Rina spoke again. “Sorry. I overheard you say you wanted to go to Joypolis. I actually have some tickets,” She showed them the glossy gold tickets. “I’m planning on going there this weekend. Would you like to come?” She remembered the things her parents taught her about making friends. Don’t be pushy. Invite them, but don’t force it. Be open and welcoming. “It’ll be fun.”

The two girls exchanged confused looks. Rina raised her own eyebrows. She assumed they would be happy about being invited to Joypolis. Instead, they looked at her like she had lobsters coming out of her ears. The black haired girl forced a smile as she gave her reply. “Sorry. We actually already have plans this weekend.”

“Yeah. My mom wants me to stay home and help around the house,” The red haired girl replied.

So that was it. Rina deflated, disappointed. But she remembered not to take it personally. Some kids were expected to help their parents around the house sometimes, and she herself was no exception. “I understand. Maybe some other time then,” Knowing pushing the issue wouldn’t be right, Rina returned to her desk, looking down at her tickets.

Yet another solo trip to Joypolis was in the works.

Later in the day, Rina made her way to the bathroom during study hall. As she reached the girls bathroom door, voices echoed from behind it.

“Not gonna lie, that Tennoji girl really creeps me out.”

Rina froze in her tracks. She recognized that voice. It belonged to the black haired girl who rejected her invitation.

“I know, right? She’s always so stone faced, and she always looks like she’s mad. She’s like a robot or something.”

A robot? Rina’s mouth fell agape, and a few tears struggled to creep out from her eyes. They didn’t like her? A part of her had suspected that there was another, deeper reason for why they rejected her Joypolis invitation, but she didn’t want to jump to conclusions. She didn’t want to assume the worst. But in that moment, her worst fears had been validated.

“I was talking to a boy who went to school with her before, and he said he’s never, ever seen her smile or cry or show any facial expressions at all.”

“Really? That is, like, so freaky. She always read to me like a snob who doesn’t want to be bothered about anything.”

Rina’s hand fizzed as it clenched into a fist. _‘That’s not true! I’m not a snob, and I’m not a robot!’_ She screamed in her head. What made them jump to that conclusion? They had barely said two words to her whenever they did interact.

“I’d love to go to Joypolis and all, but not with a buzzkill like her. Seriously. Her just being there brings the whole mood down.”

“So true. I wonder if she can even feel anything at all?”

Butterflies flapped dirty, poisonous wings in the pit of her stomach. Rina wanted to scream. Of course she could feel emotions! Everything they said was absolutely untrue. She wanted to march in there and tell them such. But would doing so actually change anything? Her previous attempts at making friends ended similarly no matter how much she tried to open up. For all she knew, she could prove them wrong and they’d still assume she was just some emotionless robot girl. Some people clung to preconceived notions like they were the only thing keeping them sane. Deflated, Rina shrugged and walked away...but stray tears trickled down her cheeks, melting onto the floor as she ran back to her classroom.

But before she got there, she passed a window and saw her reflection looking back at her. Yellow eyes, hot pink hair frayed outwards, her expression as neutral as ever. Unchanging. Dormant. A shiver ran through her. Were those girls right about her being a buzzkill just by having an unchanging face? She let out a breath against the glass, creating a blur or air. Using the tip of her index finger, she pointed it to where her mouth would be on the window and drew a semi circle. A smile. Bigger than what she could do. On impulse, she attempted to smile. Her lips barely curled upwards, little more than a line.

The futile display hurt like a spear going through her heart.

Maybe it was better this way. Rina made her way back to her classroom, wishing she could disappear.

* * *

Resigned to a life of solitude, Rina immersed herself in anything she could think of that could take her mind off the painful loneliness. Creating game apps. Interpreting HTML. Learning all she could about coding, programming, and all the machines she wanted to experiment with. Fixing up her quadcopter. Going to the arcades and mastering every game they had. Assisting her father with his projects. Anything that could make her forget that she longed for real, human friends was good enough for her. It wasn’t like anyone but her parents could see past her unemotive face. She steeled herself against the weird looks, the maligned whispers kids would exchange while covering their mouths, the inexhaustible supply of comments her classmates made about her.

But just because she ignored them didn’t mean they didn’t hurt. Even then, Rina knew those weren’t even the worst things about being alone.

It was the possibility that, for all she knew, they might be right.

Things came to a head one day, in her third year of middle school. Everyone was distraught to learn that a classmate, a boy named Yamada Toshio, had died in a terrible car accident. A memorial service was held at the local funeral home and everyone was invited, including Rina. She hadn’t known him very well personally, but the few interactions they had were cordial. He always said hi to her whenever they passed each other in the halls, and they were paired in group projects together. Unlike most of her classmates, he had actually given her the time of day and never made comments about her unemotive face. In fact, Rina had planned to invite him to hang out with her at Joypolis this coming weekend.

Now...he was gone. Just like that. Like he had never existed in the first place. When she got home from school that day, she bawled into her pillows at the unfairness of it all. What had he done to deserve being taken from this world?

Rina went to the memorial service, wearing a black dress her mother had picked out for her. She saw Toshio’s parents sitting on a couch, with his mother crying her eyes out, trying to hide her face with her hands. Rina’s heart ached seeing her like that. She lost her son, and in a really horrible way. Something compelled her to reach out to her and console her. She put a gentle hand on her shoulder and rubbed it, and the gesture made her pull her wet face out of her hands. Rina hadn’t meant to get her attention, but figured now wasn’t the time to be surprised.

“I’m sorry for your loss, ma’am,” Rina told her. “You have my deepest sympathies.”

The woman gave a sniff and flashed a sad smile at her. “Thank you. Your name’s Tennoji Rina, right?”

She knew her name? Rina nodded, confused.

“Toshio talked about you a lot,” The woman confessed, her voice unsteady. Out of nowhere, both her hands clasped around Rina’s free one. “A friend of ours gave us some tickets to Joypolis, but we received an extra one. Toshio wanted to invite you to hang out with him. He wanted to be your friend.”

Was he? Really? She had no idea Toshio wanted to be her friend. It made what happened all the more awful. Some stray tears trickled out from the corners of Rina’s eyes. She sat down next to Toshio’s mother, and she was suddenly pulled into a hug. Her nose caught the scent of lavender perfume. Nobody except for her family had ever done this before. Perhaps Toshio’s mother wanted some comfort. Rina’s shoulders relaxed as she lifted her hand up to rub her back. She knew the gesture wouldn’t bring Toshio back, but at least doing this would let his mother know that Rina cared.

Actions spoke louder than words, right?

The day after that, Rina walked through the school hallways, her mind little more than a blur. She didn’t sleep very well last night, and bags hung from her eyes. She could feel them weighing her face down. Her dreams were fraught with thoughts of the car accident that took Toshio’s life. She didn’t dare try to imagine the horror he might have gone through, but it was hard not to. As she turned a corner, the sound of sobbing caught her ears. Rina stopped and looked up, her vision clearing as her mind wriggled out from its fog. A girl sat on a bench, her face in her hands, crying piteously. Two other girls sat next to her, with one girl wrapping an arm around her, pulling her close.

“I can’t stand this! Toshio-kun’s gone and...I didn’t even get to say goodbye to him!” The sobbing black haired girl girl wailed.

“I know. I know. Let it all out, Moe-chan,” One of her friends, a girl with blonde braids, rubbed her shoulders comfortingly.

Rina recognized the girl, Moe, immediately. She was one of Toshio’s closest friends. All throughout her middle school years, there was never a day when the two weren’t together. Practically joined at the hip, except for when they had to be separated for group assignments on occasion. What was her last name again? Hayashi, maybe? Rina remembered her last name read as forest, but she could never get her kanji straight. Rina’s heart went out to Moe, and as much as she wanted to comfort her, she wasn’t sure if she’d want it. Besides, her two friends were here for her already. But she didn’t want to seem uncaring either. Rina decided giving a brief condolence would suffice.

“Hayashi-san?” Rina walked in front of the bench. “Are you okay?”

Immediately, she regretted asking that question. Of course she wasn’t okay. Anyone could see that. But Moe heard her and looked up. As soon as she met Rina’s eyes, she grimaced, eyebrows furrowed, and her expression morphed into a scowl.

“What do you want?” Moe hissed the question out like it was poison.

Rina’s blood ran cold. Why did she sound mad? Maybe this wasn’t a good idea after all. She tried to move her legs, but they felt stuck to the ground. “Umm...I’m...sorry for your loss,” Rina managed to push the words out before fear could keep them stuck in her throat. “Yamada-san didn’t deserve what happened to him.”

Moe’s other friend, a girl with green hair in a boyish hair style, flashed a reassuring smile. “Thanks, Tennoji-san.”

“Do you need anything?” Rina asked.

Moe said nothing. Rina’s shoulders slumped. Maybe it was best not to push the issue. She needed some space, which was understandable. But as Rina turned to leave…

“Hey! What—?”

“You were at the memorial service, right?” Moe suddenly asked out of nowhere.

Rina turned around, her yellow eyes wide from the shock of hearing Moe’s voice. Her lips parted in soundless surprise, and she could feel her heart skip a beat from how sudden the question was. Moe had stood up from the bench and was looking right at Rina. Her face was red and puffy, but her eyes were unusually bright. Narrowed, piercing eyes tightened into a glare. A glare that was aimed right at Rina.

“Yes, I was. Why?”

“Why did you go?” Moe asked. “I don’t remember anyone inviting _you_ to Toshio-kun’s memorial service!” The patronizing, contemptuous way she said that completely flattened Rina.

“Hey! Moe! What’s gotten into you?” The blonde girl pulled on Moe’s arm, but the latter pulled it back.

“It was an open invitation,” Rina reminded her. “The flyer they made said so,” She said matter-of-factly. The Yamadas allowed anyone to attend the memorial service if they wished, even though the funeral home wasn’t the biggest one in the area.

With clenched fists, Moe marched over to Rina, her mouth pursed in a thin, hard line. Rina tried to back away, but Moe got so close, she felt trapped. “You had no right to even be there!” Moe exclaimed, eyes flashing fire. “Toshio-kun had better things to do with his life than hang out with a creepy freak like you!”

“Moe-chan! Stop! Don’t say that!” The green haired girl pleaded, pulling on Moe’s sleeve, but the angry girl paid her no heed.

Creepy. Freak. The venomous words rang in Rina’s head like someone shouting into a megaphone. Fear threatened to hold her in its grip, but she steeled herself. “I just wanted to pay my respects,” She asserted, keeping her voice neutral and calm.

“Oh, like hell you did!!” The anger in Moe’s eyes intensified, and a hand reached out to grab her blazer. Rina backed away, and Moe almost fell over, but she caught herself right away. But her hair continued to fly around her as she made another beeline for the frightened pink haired girl. “Stop thinking yourself so high and mighty like you had any right to be friends with Toshio-kun! I know he wanted to invite you to Joypolis with his family! I tried to tell him no, that you’d just be a buzzkill and suck all the fun out of it, but he didn’t listen to me!”

High and mighty? Blood rushed to Rina’s ears and all she could do was blink rapidly, hoping everything would make sense the second time around. It didn’t. The buzz in her body intensified ten-fold. This girl was throwing way too many things at her at once. She didn’t know where or how to begin processing it all at once. But she did not appreciate this girl jumping to conclusions about her.

“Look, I know you’re sad about Yamada-kun’s passing. I am too, but I really don’t appreciate you lashing out at me like this,” Rina told her in a firm voice.

“Come on, Moe-chan. You shouldn’t yell at her,” Moe’s blonde friend warned her. “She’s just trying to help--”

But she was cut off by a strange sound. Moe broke into laughter. Nausea rose into Rina’s throat. Why was she laughing? People weren’t supposed to laugh when being told off. Especially not in this kind of situation.

“You? Sad? Could have fooled me!” Moe’s laughter was pained. Full of agony. Eventually, her laughter died down, and her face contorted back into the angry scowl she had before. “I haven’t seen you shed a single tear for him! You don’t care about Toshio-kun at all!”

Don’t care? What gave this girl the right to call her integrity into question? Moe didn’t even know Rina. That did it. The dam broke. “That’s not true,” Rina exclaimed, but her monotone voice belied her outrage. It didn’t rise to any pitch higher than what she was used to. But damn if she didn’t try. “I wouldn’t have gone to the service if I didn’t.”

“Oh my God!” Moe ran both hands through her hair. “You’re so stupid! Stop pretending to care when you really don’t!”

“I’m not pretending.”

“Yes you are! You don’t even show it on your damn face!!” Moe screamed, pointing right at Rina’s face like it was the most disgusting thing in the world. “Don’t you feel anything?! You’re a robot! A walking, talking computer! No wonder nobody likes you!!”

“Moe-chan!! Stop! Now you’re just being cruel!” The blonde girl jerked on Moe’s arm once more. But again, her pleas went unheard.

Don’t feel anything.

Robot.

Walking, talking computer.

Pretending to care.

Images flashed through her mind. The photographer from first grade scolding her for not smiling big enough. One of her male classmates calling her a robot. Her mother’s blanched face when she saw other kids on Rina’s first day of elementary school. And now, with Moe outright dismissing her, patronizing her, mocking her, claiming she knew Rina better than she knew herself…

This was too much.

Rina’s arm came to life and she smacked Moe’s arm away. Moe almost fell backwards, but her two friends caught her before she could hit the floor. Rina gritted her teeth, clenched her fists, and she wanted to explode. Any attempts she made to keep her anger under control dissolved to nothing.

“You really think I can’t feel?” Rina screeched. Not as loud as she wanted, and that just made her angrier. She stamped her foot once. “Is my face really that big an issue to you? Are you that convinced that just because I’m actually physically unable to show emotions on my face, that that somehow makes me unable to feel them as well? Like that somehow makes me an uncaring, heartless person? Guess what? You’re wrong. I cried my eyes out when Yamada-kun died. As soon as I got home from school, I grieved for him. For the entire night, at that. You don’t get to just get in my face and tell me my way of grieving is wrong just because it’s not the same as yours.”

For once, Moe actually fell silent. Everyone’s mouths were agape when Rina spoke. And Rina wasn’t close to done. “By the way, if Yamada-kun wanted to be friends with me, that was his choice to make. You don’t have the right to decide who should be friends with who like you own them or make all the decisions for them. Let me ask you this: You’ve decided that because I can’t show emotions on my face, that somehow makes me a perpetual buzzkill who sucks the joy out of every fun thing there is. Did you ever make any effort to talk to me at all?”

“Wha—?”

Rina knew exactly what she wanted to say. “Did you actually ask Yamada-kun about me? About the time he and I spent together at school? Did you ask why he wanted to invite me to Joypolis with his family? Did you make any meaningful effort to get to know me in any possible way?”

The trio of girls all exchanged worried expressions, with no answer. Rina sighed, knowing their silence spoke volumes. They had every opportunity to get to know Rina better. They spent years going to school with her. Rina had tried reaching out to them several times herself, but was faced with rejection every single time. Instead, they saw her unemotive face and assumed she was just some snobby, emo girl who couldn’t be bothered with anything or anyone, leaving her to her own devices. Of course, if they genuinely didn’t want to be friends with her, Rina would have respected that. At this point, Rina didn’t want to be friends with them anyway. Why force them to do something or be with someone they didn’t want to?

“That said, I’m not here to force you to be friends with me. That’d be cruel,” Rina said. “But you really should know by now not to judge a book by it’s cover. Yamada-kun knew that much. I don’t know why you’re making my inability to display facial expressions into a big deal.”

Another thick silence fell between them. Rina wondered if she was too harsh. “Sorry. I didn’t come here to start a fight or cause trouble. That’s the last thing I wanted. I just wanted to give my condolences,” Rina murmured before turning on her heel and running away. Just like that, the trio of girls were alone again.

The world seemed to disappear from Rina’s view as she ran through the halls. Her legs carried her all on their own, and she didn’t know where she was going. She just wanted out. Out of this school. Out from everyone’s judgmental stares. The contempt in their whispers. Moe’s callous words continued to ring in her brain, each repetition louder than the last. Before she knew it, she found herself behind the school building. Cars lined the parking lot, all of them parallel to each other in their designated spaces. She noticed signs and plates that read Employee Parking Only. This was the lot used by the teachers, the staff, and anyone else who worked here. Many of the parking spaces were empty, and she didn’t see anyone hanging around.

Good. Rina didn’t want to be seen. A whirl of anger rushed through her, and she wanted to let it all out. But any way she knew how just wouldn’t cut it. One of her legs came to life, kicking a metal trash can. Not so hard that it fell to the ground, but the loud clanging noise it made was satisfying. She grit her teeth and her knuckles turned white. She wanted to hear that metallic crashing sound again. She kicked the can against the wall once more, leaving a big dent. Then she punched it four or five times with both hands, letting out a wild scream as she did so, her heart revving and hammering with every punch. She hated it. She hated all of this. She hated that Toshio was gone. She hated feeling so angry, as she knew it was unlike her to be so. She hated that Moe just assumed she was some emo girl who didn’t care about anything just because of her face. She hated that the one friend she might have made was taken away from her, as if God was punishing her for thinking she had any chance of making friends at all. She hated her Reduced Affect Display making her face permanently neutral.

More than all of that, Rina hated herself.

That day, she cried harder than she ever did in her entire life.

* * *

The end of middle school was near. With high school entrance exams coming up, Rina had something new to pour her energies towards...and she knew exactly which school she wanted to go to.

“I want to go to Nijigasaki High School,” Rina told her mother one day, showing her a brochure in the dining room. “It’s much bigger than every other school in the area, and it has a lot of science and tech electives I could sign up for.”

Rina and her parents had visited various high schools on the weekends they were home, just to see what they were like before deciding on which one to focus on. Rina took a look through the Nijigasaki High School’s website and was blown away by the gargantuan amount of classes and electives they had. Science, chemistry, shop classes, film classes, graphic design, robotics classes...the list went on and on. Rina kept bouncing at her computer chair as she looked through every single class they had. She struck gold. This was the school she wanted to attend. Not only was it much bigger than her middle school, and all the other high schools in the area, the increase in size meant a much more expansive student population.

A chance that the people there wouldn’t know her, nor care that Rina couldn’t display facial expressions. Besides, the sooner she graduated from middle school, the happier she’d be. Even if she was resigned to being alone for the rest of her school days, Rina looked forward to being able to attend Nijigasaki High School, if only for the expansive classes they offered.

She studied day and night, doing all she could to prepare herself for the entrance exams. When exam day arrived, Rina was surprised to find that she zipped through the tests like she was a go kart racer speeding through a race track. All the information she stored in her mind came spilling out when her pencil met the test papers. Of course, she’d have to wait several days for the test results to come in and show whether she got in or not. Rina wasn’t sure what she’d do if she didn’t get accepted into Nijigasaki. But lo and behold, she had been accepted. Her parents were overcome with joy, to the point of not only buying her a nice cake to celebrate, but some tools she could use to fix her machines whenever she needed to.

Her decision to go to Nijigasaki wound up changing everything.

One day, Rina stared at one of the big windows of the school, seeing her robotic expression reflect back at her. She overheard some girls talking about going to the arcade and wanted to invite them to go with her, since she had a coupon. But when the time came and she saw their eyes on her, she got cold feet and left. She once again used the tip of her index finger to draw a semicircle where her mouth would be. A smile. Nothing like the ones she could ever make. She wondered if things would be this way forever.

She pulled out the coupon. Another solo trip to Joypolis. Then, everything got dark all of a sudden. A shadow fell over the coupon, and she felt a presence looming right next to her.

“Hi there! What’s up?”

A voice she didn’t recognize rang next to her, too close for her liking. Rina looked up, seeing that a girl had approached her. Scraggly, bleached blonde hair was held up into an equally messy ponytail, and the girl’s amber eyes were bright, positively radiant. Rina glanced at the bow tie on her uniform. Dark red, with a pale yellow and dark blue stripe. A second year. What was a second year doing approaching her? Why did she approach her? Questions ran through Rina’s mind, and her heart began pounding in her chest.

 _‘I’m scared,’_ Rina thought. Was this girl going to bully her?

As if reading her mind, the older girl smiled and attempted to assuage her fear. “Aww, don’t worry, I don’t bite. You looked kinda down, so I thought I’d come over and say hi,” The girl told her. When she glanced at the coupon in Rina’s hands, her eyes went wider than usual, and she immediately beamed. “Wow! That’s a Joypolis coupon! Man, that place is so cool, isn’t it?!”

She liked Joypolis as well? Rina shivered. A part of her wanted to invite this blonde girl to go with her. The girl did approach her of her own volition and seemed nice enough. But the cynical part of her cast doubt. Just because she liked Joypolis, that didn’t mean she’d want to go with someone whose face didn’t change one bit. Nothing would change at all. It had always been this way. Why should she expect anything different? On impulse, Rina extended both arms out, holding the coupon to the girl’s orange brown cardigan, evading her gaze by looking down.

“You can use it to go with your friends, if you want,” Rina stammered.

This was how Rina thought it’d play out. Either the girl would take the coupon and walk away, or just walk away. Or maybe she’d gossip about being approached by a pink haired robot girl to her friends, being no different than the other girls Rina encountered in her school years.

“How about we go together?”

What? Rina was sure her ears were playing tricks on her. She looked up, eyes wide and mouth agape, unable to contain her awe. Was this really happening? Before she could process it, the girl had taken her by the hand and led her away from the school. This had never happened before. More than that, the girl didn’t seem to care that Rina had a permanent poker face. It felt as though a ray of sunshine had broken through the thick, dark clouds, finally putting an end to the rain storm in Rina’s heart.

When they got there, the blonde girl stopped in her tracks. “Oh! I forgot to introduce myself? Whelp, such bad manners, right?” The girl playfully bonked herself on the head with one fist. “I’m Miyashita Ai. What’s your name?”

“Tennoji Rina,” She said.

Ai flashed a big grin. “So how about we try one of the fighting games?”

Rina pulled out her coupon. “I’m game. But I’m warning you, I’m pretty good at those. You’re talking to a seasoned Joypolis veteran.”

That day wound up being the best day she ever had. She and Ai spent hours playing games, eating at the food court, and chatting up a storm. So this was what it was like to spend time with a friend. Rina felt light as a feather, and if she had wings, she was sure she’d wind up feeling so good, she’d fly away in her bliss. A friend! She made her first real friend! She wondered if Ai was a gift from God of some kind. If God really did exist, Rina thanked him in silent prayer as she made her way back to her apartment complex.

For the first time in what seemed to be an eternity, Rina went to sleep with a light heart, dreaming of nothing but Ai.

* * *

Meeting Ai was like a whirlwind. Rina had been stagnant before, but Ai came strolling in like a tornado, throwing everything out of whack...and Rina loved it. One day, the duo saw a school idol—Setsuna Yuki—perform on school grounds. Their eyes were locked onto her performance, and the crowd that had gathered around them cheered and shouted exaltations at her. After it ended, the first words out of Ai’s mouth were “Let’s join the school idol club!”

“Huh?” Rina found herself speechless. What had gotten into her?

“Wasn’t she amazing?!” Ai exclaimed, bouncing on the balls of her feet. “I want to be like that too! How about you?”

Rina stopped to think. School idols—young, school aged singers and performers—had become popular in recent years. Several schools in Japan began endorsing them, like the nearby Shinonome Academy and Touou Academy. Rina read a story once where one idol group saved their school, Otonokizaka High School, from being shut down. Rina never pictured herself being up on stage and becoming a singer...but many of those girls probably had those same thoughts. If they could connect with their audiences and make people happy...why couldn’t she? Rina didn’t want to be stagnant. She wanted to be someone people could admire and love for who she was. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to try something new.

“I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to check it out,” Rina finally replied. “Let’s see if we can find the school idol club.”

It didn’t take much for them to find the club room. When Ai and Rina opened the door, they saw eight girls gathered around a table, with one of them being Setsuna. Ai was the first to greet them. “Hello! We’d like to join the school idol club, please!” Her voice boomed throughout the club room, bursting with confidence.

Something Rina wished she had.

One girl, with black hair tipped green and tied into pigtails, approached and shook Ai’s hand. “Welcome! We’re always looking for new members. I’m Takasaki Yu,” The pigtailed girl, Yu, introduced the duo to all the other members one by one.

The girl with the crimson braids, Emma, clasped her hands together and greeted them warmly. “We’re so happy to have you here!”

“Thank you for having us,” Rina said, bowing in a 90-degree angle. But she wondered if her greeting sounded stiff or forced.

Every day after that was full of laughter and merriment. Rina never expected that she’d wind up making nine new friends, becoming a school idol, and putting herself out there, not even in her wildest dreams. But they always say the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Rina took that step when she decided to befriend Ai. Everyone appreciated her contributions to the club, from the promotional videos she made to the technology and special effects she implemented into everyone’s performances, including her own. Not a single one of them made an issue of her unemotive face. Rina had to admit, having a bunch of people around her not make a big deal out of it felt surreal. Even so, she wouldn’t change this for anything. She even found a way to get around her Reduced Affect Display: a notebook that she used to draw various faces and expressions, like happiness, anger, or embarrassment, with a sharpie marker, and during performances, the headset with a screen that created digital facial expressions. Rina wondered why she had never thought of this beforehand.

One day, about a week after her idol performance at Joypolis, Rina found herself staying after class, sitting with three other girls. The quarter were engaged in hearty, animated conversation about a TV show they saw.

“Oh my God! Did you see the latest episode of _Analogue Heart_? It was soooo good!”

“I know, right?! That last scene had me bawling my eyes out!”

“Me too,” Rina chimed in, putting her board in front of her face. This page showed a set of eyes as wiggly lines, the mouth was open in a sideways oval, and circle shaped tears trickled down the drawing’s cheeks. “The feels hit me hard.”

“Ugh, so much happened! I wonder how the next episode will turn out?” The brown haired girl exclaimed.

Rina turned the page on her board and held it up. This page showed two angle brackets, the greater than sign and less than sign respectively, taking the place of eyes, and an upside down triangle served as the mouth.

“I’m super excited,” Rina said, making her voice slightly louder in case the board muffled it. “I’m going to DVR it first thing.”

Not long after, Ai popped her head in the classroom. “Rinari!” She waved her arm back and forth, gesturing for her to come over. “Our next practice session is going to start!”

Rina stood up and faced her classmates. “I’ll catch you all later.”

“See ya! Have fun!” The trio of girls waved goodbye as Rina joined up with Ai. But before she left, Rina waved back at them.

As they skipped down the hallway with more spring in their step, Ai held onto Rina’s free hand. “Made some friends, did you?”

Rina blinked once, but her cheeks burned. “Yes. They’re a lot nicer than I thought they’d be.”

Ai flashed her signature radiant grin. “I’m so glad! You should invite them to your apartment some time,” She suggested.

The idea did sound appealing. “Asagi-san said she wanted to see Aran, my robot kitty. I...I think I will,” Rina replied.

Her lips curled into a semicircle. Not a big one, but Rina could see it reflected on a window she passed by. It didn’t look as neutral as it usually did. Rina knew this was a sign. Sure, she would always have to live with Reduced Affect Display, but she thanked her stars that she decided to apply for Nijigasaki High School. If she hadn’t come here, met Ai and the rest of the girls, and become a school idol, who knows how she might have turned out?

“Race you to the club room?” Ai leaned in, asking the question with a touch of mischief.

“You’re on,” Rina made the first move, sprinting ahead of her friend.

There was no point in dwelling on the past. Rina ran ahead of Ai, and didn’t look back. Not even for a second. Even with her permanent poker face, Rina could tell a bright future lay ahead of her, a rainbow of possibilities.

And with her friends by her side, Rina wasn’t alone anymore. Outside, her face was neutral, but inside, she was smiling, her cup of happiness overflowing as she looked forward to what tomorrow would bring.


End file.
